Episode 27 |

Living With Intention to Improve Your Creativity and Relationships: Ephraim Olschewski

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This Week’s Guest:

Ephraim Olschewski is a high level coach for entrepreneurs and businesses. He starts at the individual level, working with the foundation for a business’ success-whether it’s the CEO, the executive team, or the sales team. He is an expert at sales, business processes, mindset shifts, intentionality, and making incredible distinctions that will change every aspect of your life.

Episode:

Are you living intentionally, completely, and on purpose? Ephraim Olschewski lives every part of his life with intention, from working with clients, going on vacation, or even going to the store. Finding what works for you and your life becomes easier when you are open, and on today’s episode we are going to learn how to become more committed, more complete, and more successful through living life intentionally.
We Discuss:

  • How to live an intentional life.
  • Finding a complete life through mending relationships.
  • Living judgment free and happy.
  • Using affirmations to find positivity.

Here’s what I learned:

Being Committed and Intentional

  1. Ephraim once told Stephan that he is intentional in everything that he does.
    • He doesn’t have any downtime and doesn’t allow himself to show up unintentionally.
  2. He moves through the world as himself and feels that is important.
    • Whether you are with a client or in the grocery store—be yourself at all times.
  3. Commitment and intentionality go hand-in-hand, especially in the world of marketing or coaching.
    • A lot of people talk about how they can travel all time and work on the beach.
    • Ephraim wants people to know they can count on him-unless they have previously spoken about it, he will be in his office for work.
    • Having dedicated work or travel time, and separating them, works better for him.
  4. One of the most important questions that you can ask is “What is it that I’m really committed to?”
    • Then, ask “What is the difference I’m really committed to make and how do I bring intentionality to everything that I do to my entire life?”
  5. Ephraim has a client who can be on an airplane, meet an incredible person and have this amazing story.
    • He says he is just living his life and that happens, but he is showing up intentionally and opening up.

When to be Intentional

  1. Ephraim is intentional with everything-even the most mundane activities.
  2. He doesn’t have TV and doesn’t flip through the channels aimlessly.
    • Stephan recently canceled his Netflix account because it became too easy to binge-watch shows and get caught up in a mundane activity.
  3. Stephan was at a workshop in July that has made fundamental shifts for him.
    • The first day, he showed up three minutes late with excuses.
    • He realized through Ephraim’s help that he was setting a low standard and showing up in an ineffective way in other people’s lives.
    • It was a powerful and uncomfortable lesson that allowed him to become more aware.
    • One of the most difficult things for us to do is really take an honest look at confronting the ways that we operate that don’t really work.

Workability

  1. When something is not workable, it just doesn’t work. It doesn’t mean that it’s wrong.
    • Stephan uses the phrase “There’s nothing wrong here, it’s just not workable.”
  2. Ephraim had a training where they drew a line in the middle and on one side, they wrote wrong and then on the other side, they wrote right.
    • What he saw was that there are two sides of the same coin.
    • He couldn’t be right without someone else being wrong-it’s in contrast.
    • Then, they crossed that out and on the one side, they wrote working and not working.
    • He thought wrong means not working and right means working.
    • He realized that there wasn’t a right or wrong, but it either works or doesn’t work.
    • Another way that you can see it would be-What is powerful and non-powerful?
  3. Look for what works for you-what’s powerful and what’s not powerful in your life.

Being Complete

  1. In the earlier part of Ephraim’s life, there was something missing.
    • He thought that if his parents would have loved him differently, that his life would be different.
  2. He discovered what it was like to move through the world being complete.
    • If you’re whole, then nothing’s missing-you live in the world from a place of being complete.
  3. To him, it means that life is a function of relationships.
    • It’s tremendously useful for living a successful happy life when you’re complete with your parents.
    • Love, honor, and respect them the way they are.
    • You can’t make somebody be complete with you, but you can be complete with them.
  4. Sometimes you have to confront the hard things that don’t work.
  5. Stephan cut off his aunt when he was in his early 20’s.
    • People change, and she had changed and evolved.
    • He used a visualization exercise, imagining what it feels like for that energy to flow into them, filling yourself up with love from the universe.
    • The next day he called his aunt-after 20 years, and now they speak often.
  6. You can become complete even if your parents aren’t around-it’s about being complete within yourself.

The Wall of Context

  1. There’s a wall that separates us with the person that we’re in communication with-the wall of context.
  2. To climb that wall, it helps to be clear in the way that we interpret things, and the way we hear things.
  3. Be interested in relating to others and being related to.
    • Imagine a fence in between two people-you need to get over to the other side of that fence and communicate.
  4. Don’t judge-as soon as you judge, there’s separation.
  5. The next time you have an argument or some kind of a disagreement, really get what it is like for that person—from their view, the way that they see it.
    • You can reverse it and argue each other’s points from their point of view.
    • Rather than disagreeing, ask them about it-”Tell me how it is that you see the world that way?”
  6. You should also summarize and validate why their point makes sense, and empathize.

Affirmations

  1. Ephraim studies neuroscience and is interested in what’s going on in people’s brains.
  2. When you use language over and over again, repeatedly, you create neural pathways in the brain.
  3. His purpose for affirmations are a way to stay very present to what he is committed to and what kind of difference he is making.
  4. You have better results when you use affirmations not just in the morning, but also at night.
  5. Having classical music in the background while you’re saying your affirmations also helps to stimulate the brain activity.

Links & Resources Mentioned

Next Level Experience

Tony Robbins

Radical Honesty

The Tools

Byron Katie: Loving What Is

Byron Katie: A Thousand Names for Joy

Byron Katie: I Need Your Love

The Work

Stewart Emery: Actualizations

Napoleon Hill: Outwitting the Devil

Intraexperience.com

Get Optimized!

  1. Become a better communicator by listening to what others are saying, and trying to understand their view points.
  2. Use affirmations twice a day to create positivity-bonus if you add classical music to your affirmation time.
  3. Don’t judge others. Open yourself up to loving everyone, you never know who will bring you the gift of enlightenment.

Thank you for listening!

As always, thank you for tuning in. Please feel free to contact me or leave a comment. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it!
-Stephan

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